Saturday, September 1, 2012

Actual Headlines

Do they proofread this stuff? Here are actual newspaper headlines:

-Miracle cure kills 600 patients
-Rangers get whiff of Colon
-Total lunar eclipse will be broadcast live on Northwoods Public Radio
-The bra celebrates a pair of historic milestones this year
-Starvation can lead to health hazards
-Rally against apathy draws small crowd
-Police arrest everyone on February 22nd
-Parents keep kids home to protest school closure
-New sick policy requires two day notice
-Nudists fight erection of towers near Wreck Beach
-Man with 8 DUIs blames drinking problem
-Hospitals resort to hiring doctors
-Homicide victims rarely talk to police
-Barbershop singers bring joy to school for deaf
-Meat head resigns
-Statistics show that teen pregnancy drops off significantly after 25
-Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Find Weapons
-Caskets found as workers demolish mausoleum
-County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds
-Puerto Rican teen named mistress of the universe
-Man accused of killing lawyer receives new attorney
-Study shows frequent sex inhances pregnancy chances
-Bridges help people cross rivers
-Meeting on open meetings is closed
-City unsure why the sewer smells
-Worker suffers leg pain after crane drops 800 pound ball on his head

No comments:

Post a Comment